Stopping Time

Well I managed to do it, I sat myself down and deliberately wrote a poem. This is the result:

Stopping Time

I wish the clock would just stop its ticking

And the sun would stop its rise

And the calendar pages stop flipping off the wall

In quick succession

I wish all the crowding

Must Do’s

And Should Do’s

Would halt mid thought

And time would just STOP

Let the sun continue to shine

Just there

Peeking through the trees

And let the air be fresh and cool

But the cars

STOP

The airplane buzzing overhead

STOP

Everybody scurrying about

Busy with their tasks

Just FREEZE

Let me alone step out

Feel the grass between my bare toes

Cares the coarseness

Of the maple tree’s bark

Stroll easy and slow down to the river

But there’s the rub

(there’s always a rub)

Would the river still flow?

Could I sit for immeasurable time

And watch the brown waters swirl

In ever changing patterns

Around jutting rocks

And over-hanging branches?

Or would the frozen time

Freeze the river?

Would an icy glint

Meet my eye?

And the trees,

Would their branches sway

In the breeze?

Would there even be a breeze?

Would I have cast a curse

Upon all the world?

A Midas Touch

Of time?

No flitting birds

No leaping squirrels with their flicking tails

No bees

Or flies

It would be a desolate stillness

Reproachful in its beauty

Like stepping into a still life

Changeless and terrible

It’s a case of “be careful what you wish for”

Instead of stopping time

I’ll need to treasure each second

At it flows unceasing

Relish the fresh breeze

The ever-changing patterns of sunlight

Rejoice in the river flowing past

In the very midst

Of all the Must-Do’s and Should Do’s

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Storm Before and (almost) After

7:30 am

                Yes, indeed, hurricane is coming, but we are ready, by golly. Or as ready as we could be having spent ALL DAY yesterday working on it. Right now it is just raining, kind of intermittent going from drizzle to heavy in half hour or so cycles. The wind is supposed to pick up around noon. I have cages set up in the basement to accommodate bunnies if need be during the worst of the wind. Of course, if the power goes out and the sump pump fails, that might be a problem and I guess in that event we’ll be hauling blocks in to lift them up. Lots of ifs. I also have space in the garage, but that will only fit a few cages. I used all the small extra cages in the basement, figuring if need be, we’ll carry the big cages into the garage. It will be a total pain if I need to do it, but at least it is more or less ready. I also brought a big bag of mixed feed inside and the barrel of hay so that at least I do not have to open the feed bin and get rain inside it. I will still get soaked myself when I go out there to feed which will have to be soon. When I first got up there was a rain lull, and I obviously should have fed then, but now it has picked up, so I guess I’ll need to don the big raincoat.

                We also “battened down all the hatches” yesterday. We took in all the porch furniture, and anything else lying around that might blow. And we put heavy cinder blocks on things that we couldn’t bring in. So I’m hoping we are ok for wind, which may gust up to 70 mpg. Of course if the willow tree goes, well that is that. And we got most things off the floor in the basement, but if the sump pump goes, well that is that, too.

                Besides all that (after all that) I made peach pie last night because when I went to the CSA farm they gave me a whole bin of peach “seconds” when I told him them I wanted to freeze some for the girls to make peach pie in October. Well I did freeze some, and we had peach shortcake at a some friends’ Friday night, and there is still plenty there. So I made pie, and there is still plenty. I’ll freeze more. Maybe make some chutney? Or just eat them. Smoothie smoothie smoothie.

                I guess I’d better don the gear and feed the buns.

Same Day -  3:30 pm 

The Storm

They say there’s a lull

Before a storm

But I wouldn’t know.

We were too busy to notice

We were scurrying around

With the packing things up

Weighing things down

Stuffing things away

We took inventory

Stocked up

Made it all tidy and tight

Now it’s past

And I found out

There’s a lull after the storm

It’s a good lull

A “made it through” lull

A “sit quiet with nothing to do” lull

(Only because the storm passed over,

Petered out

So the tumult and wild fury

Went by with more of a steady “whoosh”

Than a crashing “Bang”)

So now I can sit

Watch the last of the wind

Sway the trees

(Well, it’s not over yet

We may still see some damage)

But mostly it’s warm

The clock is ticking quietly

The dog’s asleep

I am alone in my private space

And a lull feels good.

                8-28-11

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Hurricane's a'comin'

Getting Ready For The Hurricane

Getting ready for the hurricane
And there's nothing else to say.
I'll just add this:
It sucks. 

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Two Poems!

7:30 am

                I did it – poems both yesterday and today, but yesterday I had no time to put them here. So now I will put in both and there you go.

Reality

Get up!

Take a shower!

Get dressed!

Comb your hair!

Forget the whole make-up thing – who has time?

Get breakfast!

Feed the animals!

Make lunch!

Throw in a laundry

And dump the clean one on the bed

(sort later)

Thank god it is not winter

Since that would add:

Start a fire!

Shovel the walk!

Scrape the windshield!

Now – drive to work

Park the car

And get your butt in there.

Meditate?

Smell the flowers?

Contemplate life?

Write a poem?

HA!

Indulgence

I’m getting fat

Just like everybody else.

The sad thing is that I was thin

While I was sick.

I was slim and trim.

I looked good and I felt

Better than them

Superior and smug.

But I was sick

And couldn’t eat.

It had nothing to do with me

Or will power

Or dong the right thing while everyone else messed up.

I was just sick

And couldn’t eat.

Now that I’m better I can indulge.

Sweets? Yes!

Treats? Yes!

Feeling down-and-out? Nibble a bit of this

Snack on a bit of that.

So now I’m getting fat

Just like everybody else.

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Poem A Day

8 am

                Gonna try something new (remember how well “Evening Pages” went….). I’m going to try a Daily Poem instead of a dull daily report of my dull doings (though yesterday’s report was hardly dull!). And now I am going out to the sun room for just that purpose. And it is brrr chilly (or should I say “Cor, Nippy Noodles”?) out there.

So here goes (unedited as usual):

A tiny dynamo, all in black

Lives inside my belly

She hides a lot

But comes out when summoned

A feisty ball of fire,

But not quite that

Dare I say a Bitch?

Because she’s angry

And she’s fierce

And she can be violent.

She has an axe, she has a club

She can chop and bludgeon

Take down whatever it is

In my belly

That needs taking down.

Whatever it is

That’s tied my belly in a knot

That’s boxed me in

So I can’t breathe.

Whatever dense immovable block

Sits heavy in my core.

She’ll blast it away

She’ll slash and chop

Screaming banshee screams

To smash it all to hell.

When done
She’ll wipe her blade

Straighten her clothes

And slip away

‘til next time.

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RIP Camperbus

7 am

 I'll start with a lousy photo, but the only one I have at the moment and you'll understand its purpose as you read:

                Wow. What a blur. Sunday started out quite nice. I very much missed the girls but stayed busy as therapy. Did my run, we performed our Sunday morning ritual walk into town with Tigger to get a paper and biscuit (that’s Tigger’s treat) and tea/coffee and croissants (our treat). I puttered around after we got home: plucked bunny, picked blueberries, dug more compost, all the while watching as a huge storm threatened. We got the storm but it was very brief. And then, at just about 4:30, K left to do some errands in town and 5 minutes later I got a phone call that the camperbus was on fire. And indeed it was. We don’t know why, but it stalled right around the corner and as he tried to restart it, he saw 2 neighbors running towards him shouting that he was on fire. They tried to put the fire, coming from the engine compartment, out with the little fire extinguisher, but that was no go, so they called 911. By the time I walked over, the police had blocked off the road, there were several fire trucks, and a huge gush of water was being sprayed into the engine area.

It took a solid 45 minutes for them to put it out and it was quite dramatic, with lots of billowing smoke, gas spreading and burning under the bus, white hot chunks of the magnesium engine dripping down and shooting white hot sparks, and through it all about 4 firefighters hosing and hosing. They finally got some sort of chemical suppressant and then DPW came with a truck and back-hoe to dump sand on the engine to cool it and stop the magnesium burning. I heard later from one of the firefighters up at the station when we gave our report that water on hot magnesium just oxidizes it more and makes it burn more. So there we were at last: a very sad looking bus surrounded by charred junk that had been pulled out. Ernie’s came to tow it away. Obviously K was devastated. We went back to eat something before we drove up to the station to give our report (our renter lent us his car). After that we just came home and tried to process. There was a fair bit of texting with the girls, I texted them some photos I’d taken and I guess G showed them to folks at school and put them on Facebook and got lots of amazed reactions. The girls were both very supportive. I tried to be supportive, but as I said, K was and to some extent still is, pretty devastated. I am trying to give him lots of attention. All the neighborhood came down the street to watch the excitement and they were all also very supportive. And sad, since after all, the bus has been a neighborhood icon for 10 years. 

Here I'll add the updated photos:

                So that was Sunday. Monday was just a whirl of dealing with it all: calls to the insurance and to NC to deal with the other car, then we borrowed a neighbor’s truck to fax the corolla title to NC, then to get to Leon’s to see if he had a suitable car to buy. He had a decent one – a Plymouth that he claims is the same engine etc as a Toyota. We took it for a drive and it was fine. I don’t love it, I will sorely miss the station wagon, but it will do. We decided to eat lunch at Whole Foods to think things over, and then we drove to another dealer to see what they might have, and they had a nearly identical car for several thousand more, so we decided in the end to go for Leon’s. It has high mileage, but it looks good – no rust, runs fine. We may end up putting some money in before too long, but I think it will be ok for an around town sort of car, and it is big enough that I think I’ll be able to transport fair stuff and haul hay, etc. So we went back to Leon’s and gave him $100 to hold it for us, we stopped at the other house, and came home to collapse. I guess we had supper, and then just puttered more – I fed buns, called a few folks, messed with fiber….

                So what about today? Well, K will take the truck into work around 1. He agreed to go for a bike ride early which we’ll do after I do buns. After that I have a huge list which I was planning to write down here but I’m not sure I have the energy:

·         Start working on repairing cages

·         Deal with the last compost bin and :

·         Build new bins from pallets

·         Get stuff from work network space re last fall’s labs

·         Write notes about all that and start a new calendar for this fall

·         Start spinning Crystal’s angora that I weighed last night

And there are lots more but I can’t think of them all right now. So I’ll stop and add as I go along today.

               

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Home Again Home Again

7:15 am

                Long time no write, but for good reason. We left Monday to drive to NC to take G to WW, stayed overnight in Stanton, arrived in Asheville Tuesday, stayed over with K’s dad, dropped (pretty literally, it was very fast) G at school, did some stuff in A’ville, spent Wed night w/ f-i-l. Thurs we discovered the gas tank on the car had a leak so most of that day was spent dealing and figuring and we finally found a ride home with parents of another WW student, so we spent Fri night in Newark Delaware w/ his sister, and arrived home at last Saturday mid-day. L picked us up with the camperbus in Palmer and as soon as she got home she dashed about doing last minute preparations while I got the bike rack on the red car, then she screeched out of here for Bar Harbor. She did call from Kennebec as instructed, but did not call when she arrived in BH – probably too distracted. Actually I think she went straight to her friend’s. So I am hoping she’ll call this morning some time. And I am waiting waiting waiting to hear from G. She’s been in touch a few times, she did call while deciding on classes, though I don’t know what she finally got. And I assume she’s gotten her work assignment, but she hasn’t told me that. I texted yesterday and asked her to call sometime, but I haven’t heard. I suppose it is going to be like all those other situations where I am waiting and waiting to hear from someone. I’ll try to stay busy and not obsess.

                Once L left I very methodically unpacked, then I tidied the kitchen, cleared out the fridge,  then I checked things like worms, the garden beds (actually I watered them first of everything and they look great – the alfalfa and oats are up), then I made some supper. We had thought to go to a movie, but then, in attempting to text a friend to let her know we managed to get home, I by mistake sent the message to a different friend! So I decided I’d better call to explain, and she invited us there to have beer and swim. So we picked up some beer (for K) and ice cream from Flayvors (for me) and spent the evening there with other friends there, too. So we have pretty much been in Social Interaction Mode for 2 solid days. At some point I will attempt to vet our ride home, for now I will just say that the couple we rode with, and the couple who put us up in Delaware, are about the nicest folks ever. It would be nice if G and their daughter actually became friends, but that may be expecting too much.

                As for today (it is good to keep looking ahead): I am going to attempt to go for a run. I was unsuccessful in attempting it in A’ville. Then I think we will try to return to familiar routines by walking up to town to get a paper and go to Black Sheep. Then I guess I’d better reconnoiter. Wouldn’t it be nice to do some spinning? I guess I’d better think through the next couple of weeks because that’s all I have left and they will disappear like a puff of smoke.

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